Temperance

#14 - How to Un-high-horse Yourself | Marcus Aurelius

Reflection ✏️

Pride is a master of deception: when you think you're occupied in the weightiest business, that's when he has you in his spell.

- Quote by Marcus Aurelius from beststoicquotes.com

Pride and self-importance are deceptive mistresses.

I used to be pretty self-centered. Most things I wasn't doing, I considered to be a waste of time, because who could be smarter than me, right?

BIG LOL

I was too blind to see my own arrogance, until I was confronted with it.

Then slowly, painstakingly I started to learn how to consider other people's opinions, feelings, and points of view in the equation.

I had to get rid of my own ego, my pride.

I started to ask more questions and superimposed my own opinions less often.

I learned how to moderate myself to work with others, instead of against them.

I stopped discrediting everybody I didn't agree with, even when I did.

That felt very disingenuous to me at first, but it turns out people like you much better, and are willing to listen to you much more, when you don't always try to call them out.

Crazy, right?

Also, people can usually sniff you out pretty quickly, if you are only acting on your own agenda.

Not the best foundation to build a relationship.

You think you are being sneaky?

Think again.

Self-importance is a short-term play.

Think what you could gain in working with others, elevating them, taking less credit yourself, shining the light on others.

What will yield better returns in the long-term?

To use an analogy:

True leaders will humbly stand back while their team get showered in praise.

The team will reward them with loyalty and respect in turn.

It doesn't matter if you are acting alone, or with others. Always consider what the factors were that lead you here.

Is it really only you? Was there nothing else than your hard work? It sure is commendable to put in the effort, but what paved the way?

Never be too sure of yourself, never too proud.

Leave room for error and improvement.

Learning 💡

Moderate yourself in thinking you are the most elevated of them all.

Ask yourself: What else can you do to improve?

How could you be wrong?

What are others doing that you can learn from?

Practice the cardinal virtue of Temperance and find serenity in being wrong sometimes.

Feedback

Now we'd love to hear from you.

What situation have you dealt with where you had to take a step back and moderate yourself?

Or maybe you have another great quote regarding temperance and moderation? Don't hesitate to contact us through the quote submission form 📝

Want more? Check out last week's reflection

Get our next quote reflection straight to your inbox 👇

Share with a fellow Stoic 🙏